Perhaps I was a little naive but I never for one minute questioned our plan to move abroad. It was a dream for us: a move to a lovely warm country, no more miserable weather and a simple, mortgage free life.
However things changed and mortgage freedom wasn’t going to happen before our move. But still we continued on. The plan then: hubby would (hopefully) get a job and we would continue working towards financial freedom.
And then the questions started.
Would hubby be able to get a job in Portugal? Would his language skills be at the right level by 2012? Would we be able to keep paying down the mortgage at an accelerated rate?
And if we can’t have both, is our main priority mortgage freedom or moving abroad?
And the other question that’s playing on my mind at the moment.
Did I only want to move to Portugal to escape my job?
You see just lately I’ve really started to nest in my home. Really started to ‘bloom where I’m planted’. And I love it. I’ve finally lost the need to escape….which surprises me.
I realise that this post contains more questions than answers, but I think big life changes do this. It’s all part of the process.
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{ 12 comments… read them below or add one }
They’re very good questions – and whichever way you end up answering them, I’m sure you’ll feel better about it in the long run.
I used to want to escape all the time too – then found a job I liked and we moved house, and now I’m happiest here. We used to go on holiday/for a UK mini-break every other month – now we’ve not been on holiday since 2008 and I’ve not cared in the slightly. “Bloom where you’re planted” is my new life philosophy
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Laura Reply:
May 12th, 2011 at 6:21 am
@Louisa Some work places should rename ‘holiday weeks’, ‘escape weeks’. It’s seems a better name! It’s a brilliant philosophy to have isn’t it, takes the stress right out. I’m happy that you”ve found your place to bloom
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Absolutely don.t go unless it is what you want. That is why I have always said not to sell your house here. Do what you feel but keep your options open and leave a good escape route.
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Laura Reply:
May 12th, 2011 at 5:55 am
Hi Lizzie. It’s not that I don’t want to go as such, the questions are just playing on my mind. You’re right about selling the house, it makes perfect sense to keep it.
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These are great questions to be asking yourself now, rather than wondering later why you hadn’t considered these things. In our own case, we know for sure now that we want to move on after my husband retires.
A move overseas or to a new country is a HUGE commitment for everyone in the family. You still have lots of time to think about whether it’s what you really want to do. In the meantime, you can keep doing what you’re doing now, planning as if you’re going, paying down your mortgage, and as you get closer to your “target” date you’ll have a better idea if it’s going to work or what you and your family really want.
If that’s your mantle, I love it!
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Laura Reply:
May 12th, 2011 at 5:57 am
@Laura Yes our mantle
It is a huge commitment and one I think that I still want to do. I’m just going through an uncertain period…which I’m sure happens to everyone…let’s hope so!! 
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I think this is a super interesting set of questions. And also, it’s great that you’re willing to really think about them vs. feel like you “have” to follow through on your plan because you “said” you would do it.
The beautiful part of all of this is that you can always choose to take your time. You can choose to modify your plan. You can follow through if you want. You can make a NEW plan. And, you’ve done an amazing job of putting a life/lifestyle in place that gives you the CHOICE to do those things.
Thanks for sharing this!
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Laura Reply:
May 12th, 2011 at 6:02 am
Hi Bea and thank you! I’d much rather think about these questions before we go than after..it makes sense…I reassure myself that everyone has a little doubt over BIG decisions.
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It is so easy to start on a path without it even occuring to us to ask these questions. But it is part of the process. And answers do come. And most decisions can be reversed anyways. Good luck as you moll these over.
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Laura Reply:
May 12th, 2011 at 6:04 am
@lindy There’s been so many times in my life when I’ve jumped in without questioning why I’m doing it. This time I want to try and get it right!
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Questions always come up for me when contemplating a major change…sometimes they help and sometimes they seem to be a roadblock but most times they are a guide. I hope your questions help with you decisions. There’s nothing wrong with changing your mind if that’s what you decide.
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Laura Reply:
May 12th, 2011 at 6:07 am
Hi Gretchen and thank you. In a way I’m glad that I have questions; it’s making me really contemplate everything and this has to help in making the right decision
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Perhaps in working to get where you thought you wanted to go, you have ended up with pretty much the lifestyle advantages you thought it would give you? Also, being content where you are now doesn’t necessarily preclude a change in the future should you want to shake things up. There is no rush (regardless of the date you may have set) and nothing has been wasted, you seem only to have gained from the journey.
Anyway, hope you are just musing; and not stressing out! A path will become clear.
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Laura Reply:
May 12th, 2011 at 6:13 am
Hi Aurora, yes just musing, not stressing..thankfully
You’re so right being in a happy place now, it doesn’t stop me from moving in the future. I always thought moving to Portugal was the answer to changing my lifestyle…when all along leaving the corporate world was!
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It is interesting Laura, how things have a way of working themselves out. Not that you have decided for sure of anything yet, but how just leaving your job and spending time keeping house has freed you.
We have a dream of traveling the United States in an RV long-term. We hope to buy a used RV soon and take shorter 3 day trips here and there closer to home and a longer week trip. I think that doing this BEFORE hubby quits his job will help us see if it is even a life we will really enjoy.
The biggest thing is not to be in too big a hurry, be sure about it. I am guessing that you have already visited Portugal, but if you haven’t do so for a holiday.
Bernice
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Laura Reply:
May 12th, 2011 at 6:18 am
@Living The Balanced Life I think setting the actual date of departure sent my mind into a whirl Bernice..which is a good thing. I want to really make sure that I’m 100% certain that we’re doing the right thing.
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Follow your heart, if you change your mind there’s no failure in that. I wish you happiness
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Laura Reply:
May 13th, 2011 at 10:26 am
Thank you Francesca…I know that’s what I should do..the practical side of me takes over sometimes
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The trouble is … in a world of infinite, paralysis-inducing CHOICE the big casualty as far as I’m concerned is decision-making. I think about what I want; choose a path; then become increasingly pre-occupied and disturbed about all the choices I could make. Then I don’t do anything. What do I want? Answer: I don’t know anymore. I think this is the new malady of our age. I know exactly how you’re feeling. It’s sometimes a bigger nightmare than our parent’s generation who had few choices.
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Laura Reply:
May 17th, 2011 at 8:13 am
Anna: You are so right. This is a problem that we’ve created for ourselves. A great problem in a way, but one, like you say, that can cause paralysis. I’d love to be one of those people that just ‘jumps’ without thinking, but I’m not. I’m a planner who likes to know what’s ahead…most of the time. My husband has a much steadier approach to all this, thankfully…how he puts up with my indecision I’ll never know!
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Same here! – Husband plods on earning the money; meanwhile I’m like a fly in a bottle!
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Hi, I enjoy reading your blog. I wanted to share with you about a guy around here (Sacramento, CA, USA) who decided he wanted to live in Costa Rica (I think). Anyway, he moved down there and bought a house and the local newspaper here published some articles he wrote about life along the way. The first installment was basically “I’m so glad to be getting out of US” and waxing poetic about the simpler life style to be found in Costa Rica. By installment #3 or #4, it was clear that this place was not all he thought it would be and problems were developing. The neighbors and village where he lived were not as welcoming as he thought they would be. It also appeared he had initially thought he could rely on them for help (lots of problems with house, leaking roof etc.) which turned out not to be the case. The last installment was at the end of the first year and he had moved back to the US. He wasn’t sorry he went, but he was awfully glad he only took a leave of absence from his job rather than just resigning. I think he had sold his house so he’s renting.
While I think there is a world of difference in the level of preparation you’re going through vs what he did (nothing, I think), I think his leaving his job open was a good step. It made it so he could come back and make a living if he found out it was all a mistake. I think it’s a good idea to leave yourself an escape route just in case you find out that you’d rather vacation in Portugal rather than live there.
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